Entering the Next Chapter

There are so many times that I wish I could just get a moment of peace and quiet. Mom....mom...moooommmmm..... There are times when I can not even hear my inner dialogue over the sound of two siblings bickering, a teenager blaring her music, the sound of the dog barking at the invisible threat. Mom....mom...moooommmmm..... The sound of the chips being spilled all over the kitchen floor and then the horrible sound of them being stepped on by little feet instead of being picked up. Mom....mom...moooommmmm..... There are days when I literally hide in my car to just have the moment of peace and quiet. There are days when all I want is quiet.  Then there are days like today. Days when my babies are at their father's house and it feels like a part of me has gone with them. It feels as if I took a deep breath when they walked out the door and I will not be able to breathe again until they return. Today I have the quiet... but I still do not have the peace. The quiet is eerie and encompa

I have always found writing very therapeutic especially in times that I can not completely process my feelings and thoughts. I decided that I would write my way through the five stages of grief.  As a general background on grief, there are said to be five stages of grief. DABDA.. Denial... Anger... Bargaining... Depression... and Acceptance. I believe that everyone goes through all the stages when mourning but the length of time a person spends in each one varies greatly from person to person. For example some people might only spend a few seconds in denial while another can spend a day or week. All of the stages are our bodies way of processing and protecting us.  Today I lost someone... well I didn't really lose them because I know right where he is. He is in heaven. He is a man of many names. Some call him Carvin, some call him Pastor Don, some call him father, grandpa, husband, and I called him P. Don. I met him when I was in a very broken place. I was recently separated fr

Warning: This is me getting on my soap box. As always I do not expect anyone who does not share my beliefs to follow my beliefs. I also do not apologize for honestly giving my thoughts and beliefs, but am more than happy to hear your views from you... so please share in the comments section.  Today my girls and I went to visit my parents church which is lead by Pastor Sharp. What he brought up was the way we conform to the world instead of rejecting the views of it. I think that often we end up conforming to the world's views through slowly compromising, most often through a process we call "Political Correctness".  This is a picture of the Grand Canyon. What amazes me is that they think the shape of the canyon is caused by wind and water (the river). It is said that a constant drip of water can shape and wear down a stone or rock. This reminds me of American Christians. We are built on such a strong foundation. We are built on the rock but through allowing just

Have you ever had a moment where everything seemed to come crashing down around you? Where frustration turned into tears of distraught and no matter how hard you try to pull yourself out of that bad place you were stuck feeling stranded and alone?  Most of the time I would consider myself pretty easy going. So many things happen all the time that even though they might bother me I am able to just keep going. Most of the time I am Dory... I just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. What do we do? We swim, swim.  But occasionally I find myself in a place where I can't swim anymore and I just need rescued.  Last Tuesday, I had one of those moments. Let me set the scene for you.  I had been battling a case of bronchitis for a week already and began to get worse. I hadn't been sleeping well due to being sick and due to the littlest one waking up every night at 1am and staying up for three to four hours. Both of my poor little girls were sick too. This day also seemed to be a

Dear friend of mine,  I know that you are facing a difficult time in your life. I know that things seem overwhelming, confusing, and hopeless. It can be so hard to see God's hand moving at this time.  I wish that telling you that God is in control would make it all better, but part of faith is choosing to believe even when you don't feel it. My heart aches for you. I truly wish I could take this pain from you or help you through this time. Your burden is on my heart and I will be praying for you. I truly believe in the power of prayer and can see God moving in the lives of others as they face times of trial. I love you and am there for you if you need me.  -Faith The last several years have been very turbulent in my life. God has shown me His grace and peace in these times but they were times of great trials. For the last week we have been in a time of peace. It has been a great relief. Sadly, as I am in this time I see all those I love around me in times of pain and disa

Finding the meaning of Christmas can be difficult when society views the meaning of Christmas as a very materialistic day. Christmas has become about fairy tales, music, baking, family, and presents. I am not saying that any of those things are terrible but when the purpose for celebrating is forgotten what is the rest really worth? So many people have become like those acquaintances who send you birthday wishes on Facebook not because they remembered your birthday but because they saw it posted and saw that everyone else was writing on your wall. They were being kind and were jumping on the band wagon out of convenience not out of true care. I don't want to be an acquaintance of God, I want to be a friend of God or even better yet a child of God. I want to celebrate the birth of Jesus because I have a relationship with Him and am thankful for Him.  As I have been reading through the scriptures that tell of the birth of Jesus I have been a little convicted, sad, and than