Entering the Next Chapter

In the past I thought being a good Christian meant wearing a mask. Projecting an image of happiness and wholeness to all those around me. I thought the mask would help others to see Jesus through me. It would keep my brokenness from becoming a distraction to others. I would wear this mask that I created and when the mask would slip, I would become overcome with guilt for failing as a Christian. Through the last several years, I have found that sometimes people can see God most shining through the cracks of my brokenness. I was doing God no favors by being artificial. God wanted to use my brokenness. He wanted to heal my brokenness. He wanted to love me in my brokenness. As a society we have things that are stigmatized. Things that go unspoken for fear of rejection and judgement. Sadly, this is not much more different in our Christian walk.There are some subjects that are uncomfortable and can make us feel vulnerable. Top Three Things Christians Hide: (Some of these overlap) 1.

As a woman I think one of the most difficult things to deal with is not a particular situation, but rather the lack of control in a situation. There is a small comfort in having control over things in my life. There is a false sense of stability.  Things I like to have control over: My children, my household, my finances, my friendships, my vehicle, and my spouse. I have this irrational fear. I fear that once I lose control of one thing, everything else will fall apart. I often wonder if God allows certain things to happen in order to show me that He is in control.  This may seem a little off subject but hang in with me and you will quickly see where I am going with this.  I opened up the church bulletin and a disappointment set in. I saw that the sermon was focused on a woman's responsibilities in marriage. It may sound bad but to be honest, I didn't want to be convicted. I didn't want for anyone, including God to correct what I am currently doing as a spouse. What s